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Sign of the Something - Squint your eyes and look closer...
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Tue, Aug. 14th, 2007 07:21 pm
Sign of the Something

Last weekend, i reunited with family members i hadn’t seen in a decade or so to celebrate the wedding of my cousin Ashley, who is now one-half of Mr. and Mrs. Brandon S. (I tried very hard not to visibly shudder each time this label was announced). Amongst the issue of my grandparents and their siblings, my clan of six is the only cluster to venture further than Iowa; this event was something of an ordeal.

When it came time to toss the bouquet, i tried rather unsuccessfully to slink under the table unnoticed. With verbal prodding by my mother and physical assistance from second cousin Jamie or Cheyenne (identical twins I can no longer tell apart), i begrudgingly traipsed toward the back of the gathering crowd. For my part, i dragged poor older sister Robby, who spent the entire evening fielding questions about when she and Paul would solidify their relationship with the force of law (a question undoubtedly more awkward for Paul, who had met the numerous inquirers no more than twice and was therefore unable to politely adopt Robyn’s response, which amounted to “shove off,” in slightly less british terms).

As Robby and i cursed the stupid tradition, Ashley threw the flowers over her shoulder with a bit more arch than necessary or practical, prompting them to bounce off the escalator we had so wisely congregated underneath. Ten-year-old first-cousin-once-removed Sierra boldly rushed forward, swept the bouquet from the ground, and held it up triumphantly, secure in the knowledge that she will be the next to marry.

And according to my mother, she may very well be. “Sign of the times,” she proclaimed as we returned to the tables. “Huh?” Robyn and i inquired simultaneously, trying to ascertain whether we were somehow being slighted. “As the bouquet was released, the crowd collectively recoiled. Sierra was quite apparently the only one in the group with any interest in being married; the rest of you stared at it as if poison. Sign of the times,” she said again, before venturing to the next table to share her observations with a different generation, filled with those who might appreciate the novelty of such reactions.

“Sign of the something,” i joked to Robyn who smiled knowingly. “So, when are you and Paul going to tie the knot?”

Current Mood: amused
Current Music: Erin McKeown - You Were Right About Everything

11CommentReplyShare

devonbree
devonbree
p d b g
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 07:55 am (UTC)

Those times have been a long time coming. I've been watching young single women avoid catching bouquets for fifteen years now. To say nothing of young men who practically step backward away from a tossed garter, where that tradition still exists.

There are, of course, exceptions. One of my prized possessions is a photograph of my future wife stretching across a lot of reluctant young women in an effort to catch a bouquet. She practically bursts out of the photograph to do it, there's so much obvious enthusiasm.


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futurerelics
futurerelics
The Future That Was
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 05:53 pm (UTC)

We had a garter toss too, though i was not really paying attention to the reactions of those who were supposed to be catching it.

The thing is, between the world of opportunities available and the incredibly high divorce rates, it doesn't surprise me at all that the collective response is to view marriage with some trepidation.


ReplyThread Parent
lilskatingal
lilskatingal
Patty
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 10:40 am (UTC)

hahah that cracked me up. i think i start going to classmate weddings soon ... time to get good at recoiling.


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futurerelics
futurerelics
The Future That Was
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 05:32 pm (UTC)

Where on this planet can you be found at the moment? I've been following your travel blog. It is, um, less than informative.

Also, once you return to Baltimore, where will you be receiving mail? I found a card that must be redirected to your possession.


ReplyThread Parent
evil_fizz
evil_fizz
Elizabeth
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 12:30 pm (UTC)

I have been at weddings where single women sort of stared at the bouquet lying on the group. (Also comical: the bouquet getting stuck in the chandelier.)

However, by far the best was the wedding where the bride spent most of her time trying not to throttle her brother's girlfriend. When she turned around to see said girlfriend clutching the bouquet, her entire face twisted into agony and then immediately smoothed out into a Stepford wife grin. The transition was priceless.

I've not yet decided if I'm tossing the bouquet (garter is out of the question), but it's not all that likely.

P.S. I made them write it into our DJ contract that I would not be Mrs. Tom and that it would constitute a material breach if they did.


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futurerelics
futurerelics
The Future That Was
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 05:43 pm (UTC)

You know, it may be worth three years of law school just to be able to appropriately draft such a contract.

And really, i don't mind this particular tradition. I mean, i'm not going to go diving for the bouquet, and i don't feel compelled to participate without external prodding, but it's not inherentl offensive. There are others that i find to be more cringe worthy.

One element that i did enjoy? Instead of clinking glasses to make the bride and groom kiss, those who wished such a spectacle had to sing a song with the words "love" or "bliss." Not as many displays, but more opportunities to laugh at the crowd.


ReplyThread Parent
evil_fizz
evil_fizz
Elizabeth
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 07:58 pm (UTC)

I actually find the glass clinking to be cringe inducing. I have to resist the urge to yell "They are not your monkeys or something! Stop trying to break your wine glass and drink your damn wine."

So now I have to ask: what do you find cringe worthy?


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thomasirvin
thomasirvin
Thomas Irvin
Fri, Aug. 17th, 2007 06:14 am (UTC)

I've often thought that if I had a DJ at my wedding I'd make it a material breach if s/he played anything by Journey. Or the Chicken Dance.


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agirlnamedlucky
agirlnamedlucky
Rachel
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 12:48 pm (UTC)

I haven't even attended any of the weddings I've been invited to lately. Does this make me a bad person?


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futurerelics
futurerelics
The Future That Was
Wed, Aug. 15th, 2007 05:46 pm (UTC)

I don't think they're contagious, but perhaps it's safer to keep your distance just as a precaution.

And it doesn't make you a bad person. Just anti-social :-P (which isn't really how i'd describe you at all. I promise, i know anti-social).


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thomasirvin
thomasirvin
Thomas Irvin
Fri, Aug. 17th, 2007 06:13 am (UTC)

I know a ton of women who have zero interest in marriage. (In fact, I've dated a lot of 'em.)


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